I want to stay agitated

A mind not agitated by good questions cannot possibly appreciate the significance of even the best answers. It is easy enough to teach the answers parrotwise. But to develop actively inquisitive minds alive with real questions, profound questions--that is another story. Mortimer Adler

While at the most recent Navigator conference I got to hear Randy Raysbrook speak and it was so neat because so much of what he was saying was things I had been thinking about. He mentioned how we need to ask questions and have the childlike wonder and inquisitive minds.

I was raised in the church and had become trapped where I would say what I believed but really couldn't even tell you why. I have started to seek out, well what does the bible say about it? How have others interpreted it? There are always tons of interpretations on a single verse and even down to how a certain word should be translated. I look at it all and then can draw my conclusions have had studied it.

I have started doing it every time I think of something that I have always just believed and accepted and not just in the spiritual sense. I don't want someone telling me what to believe I want them to show me the facts so I can see it! And not that I have a huge distrust of people, I have close friends who tell me something that I go look for myself. That is how I learn best, I have to see it, think about it, study it before I can truly understand it. It has been an amazing experience and I feel I have grown so much since I have started to do it.

That is my hope with the college students I will be sharing with. When we started talking Navigators, I said to God, I have such a limited knowledge of the bible, what can I teach people? And God remind me, I'm not teaching them anything I am just bringing them to the bible, and showing them how to search for answers, what they take away and understand is between them and God.

I don't want to answer the students questions because I will not always be with them. I want to show them how to look, to read, where to go when they still don't understand. How to have conversations with people you might not agree with but appreciate their opinions and how they got there. And something I am still learning myself but actually LISTENING to others and learning. Not to cling so hard to some idea I think to be true if the facts are against it. I have read verses in the bible and totally thought I understood it but had to learn to be humble and realize I was wrong.

Tom and I got to have a couple meals with Randy and something I never noticed before was how Jesus didn't just answer questions. He said things and did things that made people curious, made people ask questions, made people want to get closer and learn more. To often as the church we are so wrapped up on answering everyones question about everything.

I have seen bumper stickers, signs, commercials, headlines all telling me to believe something, to act a certain way to think a certain way. And even for the ones I agree with it strikes a nerve. Why are we always telling people what to believe? We should be asking them questions that stretch their minds, make them think, create that curiosity for them to desire to learn more. Jesus did that..... I want to too

Texas comments

I realized I had a rather odd title for my last post but got so sentimental I forgot to explain. I figured I might as well make a list of some odd things said while visiting Texas

"Well that was a few high heels back"
Basically means it was awhile ago, definitely want to use this one!

"I hate when I break my g-string in church"
Actually said by my cousin Wendell, he was referring to the g-string on his guitar, gotta be careful what you say around us

"...poop..."
I just found it funny how my cousin Trace said it three times in just a few hours. And not just randomly saying it, she had stories where it just came up

"put these hamburger buns outside on the table to warm up."
yep it really was that hot

"more like Long John Throw ups!"
First time having Long John Silvers, and the last

well that was a few high heels back

Tomorrow we are heading back home to California. We have been in Texas and as usual it has gone by so fast and I feel like I have hardly started to catch up with everyone. It has been wonderful to see all my family. And thanks to facebook for helping meet up with more. I can't remember now if it had recommended family members to me or if I had searched my grandmothers name one day when I was thinking of her. Both are so likely but I was blessed on seeing two names I had heard so much about but didn't really remember.

It was so cool getting to stay and hearing stories especially about my grandma. I still think about her so often, especially with us going into Navigators. I selfishly wish she was here to see because I know she would be so excited and proud of me. She had such a heart for missionaries and I wish I had taken advantaged of the time I had with her to hear more of her stories.

Being here it reminds me again of how much I love hearing about people's history, especially the generations before me. I have had so many questions I wish I could ask my grandma and I am trying to not make the same mistake with my other grandma. It has been such a blessing being here.

We also went to hear my cousin Wendell and his family lead worship at church, I just love getting to worship with family. The night before they had pulled out guitars and handed them our and just all singing worship songs together was so awesome! Meeting my cousin Wendell was so cool, I felt like I knew him even before I got out here through our brief messages on facebook. But he is one of those people who is just so open and honest and it just felt so comfortable with him and his whole family right away. They were such a neat group. I feel so blessed that I have such an amazing family and with so many that love Jesus and want to serve Him and I love that its so easy to stay in contact with them. Can't wait for them to come to visit us!

Dad's birthday

the first gift..... 7 people who have been staying at their house today are heading home, only 2 (besides Dora) left. Bet the house is much more quiet. My wonderful dad puts up with all us crazys, he is kind and doesn't say anything, just goes to work. Lol poor guy, yesterday he was outside quietly enjoying a cigar and next thing he knew all of us were surrounding him. We all just enjoy his company, what can I say. Oh well dinner tonight will be a small affair. Can't wait to give him his gift, my mom helped me out and I think he is really going to like it :) praise God for wonderful fathers!

Chaos

We are home!!! ... ok well technically I at Higher Grounds, a coffee shop close to our house using their internet. The guys living above us are moving and we had been sharing internet with them so now not only are we losing super neighbors we lost internet. We called to set it up and the soonest they can get out is Saturday boo. Oh well. Our buddies here at HG said we can come by whenever.

So Colorado Springs went well. We got to meet our "classmates" other people who are joining Edge Corps this year, we will be going to multiple conferences with this group over the next year to two years. Its nice also having friends that are going through the exact same challenges as us. It was encouraging to go and share stories of fundraising. Tom and I are about 77% (praise God!) so we will be getting a small salary, I think like minimum wage, starting the end of this month and also we will start getting insurance! Tom hasn't had a paycheck since December so this will be a huge help to our savings which has slowly been decreasing. Luckily I have had a job but I am pretty much done with that and will be working on fundraising with Tom now.

I have been thinking on John 9 a lot lately. I read it recently and it really just struck me. Its when Jesus heals a man born blind and this man, before he even totally knows who Jesus is, is able to reason with the Pharisees so well that they have no argument against him and just send this guy (who probably never attended any school) away. Some days I feel so overwhelmed by the task in front of me. I have no training, I have never even been on a missions trip, how can I speak Gods truth and love to people? But thats the cool thing, I'm not alone. And its been so cool how God keeps growing this love and passion for the students of Cal Poly, I can't wait to start having them over, feeding them, sharing life with them.

This weekend Tom is giving a bachelor weekend for his friend and they are camping and all sorts of boy stuff. He is the best man so hes in charge. I am the wedding coordinator of sorts. So its been fun, my main duties are the day before and of. And since she is super organized it makes it really easy. I can't wait for the day, its going to be so much fun. I love planning and this type thing. But before that we have a weekend trip to the Valley and a week trip to Texas. At least its all fun stuff.

So before all the family arrived, Monique (our exchange student that we had my senior year of high school) and her parents stayed here for a few days. I can't believe it had been 7 years since I last saw her! It was so cool catching up, we had a BBQ for her and a few friends from HS came by too and it was so cool catching up with everyone and remembering stuff. I miss Monique already but her family did offer an invite to me and Tom to come stay with them in Brazil, hopefully someday we can get down there!

This week is filling up fast, but I think this weekend I am having a girls night, can't wait!